


The Colour and the Shape

by Eurydicoy



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Amazing Spider-Man (Movies - Webb)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, First Time, Gen, Insecurity, M/M, Misunderstandings, wade is the best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-01-18
Packaged: 2018-05-14 20:03:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5756440
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eurydicoy/pseuds/Eurydicoy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Maybe Peter lied about his sexual experiences when he and Wade first met.<br/>Maybe things changed and he and Wade are a couple now. And maybe Peter still didn't tell his boyfriend the truth.</p><p>Or the one where Peter is too shy to tell Wade he's still a virgin and Wade thinks Peter is just not attracted to his scarred body.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Colour and the Shape

It was so embarrassing. Peter wasn’t sure why he thought it would be a good idea to read the magazines aunt May and Gwen sometimes bought. He thought it couldn’t get worse when he asked his friends for sex tips and had to endure minutes of laughter. But no, here he was. Sitting behind his desk at the Bugle and blushing like the Virgin Mary herself. Well it wasn’t exactly a lie. Which was the reason he was in this dilemma in the first place. It started almost eight months ago when Peter and the Avengers had to fight bad guys from outer space again. But this time they worked together with the famous ‘Merc with a mouth‘ and Peter started to fall in love. Okay, the love part happened a few months later after endless nights of talking and watching reruns of old sitcoms. And they talked about everything. Everything.

And when Wade started to talk about his –non-existent- sex life and his first time with a man - and hell did Peter start to blush at that part – he also casually asked Peter about his first time and Peter…well, he lied. He lied and never thought about it again. At least until he and Wade kissed for the first time and everything changed. And he never dared to tell Wade the truth. He’s pretty sure that Wade wouldn’t be mad or disappointed because he was technically a virgin but Peter was still afraid that his boyfriend would be hurt that Peter never told him the truth. What if Wade thought that Peter didn’t trust him enough? His boyfriend got easily upset and Peter didn’t want to be the reason for the mercenaries insecurities. He loved him and god did he want to have sex with him but he was still insecure about it. Should he tell Wade the truth and risk hurting him? Or should he just ignore it and have sex with Wade without his boyfriend knowing about his lack of experience? No, Wade would never forgive him if he’d find out.Or would he?

 

Peter sighed and closed the stupid magazine. The tips were just as useless as his friends. They only told him that he shouldn’t have lied in the first place. Thank you very much. Wade wouldn’t have judged him but now it’s too late and Peter needs to tell his boyfriend the truth. His boss‘ shrill voice jolts him out of his daydreams.  
„Parker! Why are you still here? I’ve got nothing to do for you and don’t think I’ll pay you extra money for staying longer than you have to!“ Ugh how much he hates Jonah. But Peter just waves while he’s putting his camera and his notebook into his bag and tries to stuff the magazines into the trashcan without anyone noticing. Of course he fails when one of it falls to the floor and his annoying co-worker Annalise moves to grab it. Peter could easily get it before she could even touch it but not everyone needs to know about his superhuman abilities. 

 

„Uuuuh, Peter. Do you need some advice?“ she giggles like a teenager and waves the magazine around like a hand fan.  
„Nah, someone always uses my desk as a trashcan and I’m the one who needs to get rid of it. You know what it’s like when you’re the new guy and no one takes you seriously…so…you can keep it if you want. It’s stupid anyway.“ Peter realizes his mistake too late. „I mean not that I’ve read it! Definitely didn’t read it. But one of my friends always complains about how stupid these magazines are and…“ No he couldn’t find a good way to save his ass. ‚And it’s a glorious ass‘ he can almost hear his boyfriend’s words and blushed even worse. He must look so damn stupid.

 

„Sure, Parker. Keep telling yourself that. Which article did you read, huh?“ She starts to flip through the pages. „Oh, this one looks good. ‚How to make him fall in love with you!‘ But no, I’ve seen you kissing some guy a few days ago after your shift ended. What did you read then? ‚How to seduce your lover!‘ Oh I’m sure it’s this one. Tell me, did it work?“ Peter can feel how red his face is now. And it’s not just because it’s so humiliating. He’s also starting to get angry.

„I don’t know, Annalise. Why don’t you read the first article and tell me if it works? Because I have to go home to my boyfriend now. See ya.“ Yep, he feels a bit better now. Annalise’s face looks like a mixture of shock and disbelieve and Peter can hear some of his other colleagues laugh behind their hands. That’s what you get for pissing off Peter Parker. Wade’s going to be so proud.

  
The thought of his boyfriend gets Peter moving and he pushes through the door to get to the elevator that will bring him to the exit and closer to his boyfriend.  
Half an hour and an uncomfortably full ride with the train later he’s finally home. Just when he’s still trying to find his keys in his bag the door swings open to reveal his grinning boyfriend. How can he always be so cheery?

  
„There’s my baby boy! I almost wanted to go find you! You’re almost nine minutes late! No one attacked you or tried to steal your purse, right? Oh how I missed you! Come into my arms so I can kiss you!“ He’s making kissing noises and Peter can’t help but smile.

„I missed you too, Wade. But can I maybe come in first? It was a long day and I’m tired as shit.“

For a moment it saddens Peter to see his boyfriend’s face when he says it. He looks so shy and pleased . Wade still isn’t used to people telling him they love him. But he never has to live without this comfort ever again.  
„Of course, Petey.“ And two seconds later Wade drags him into their apartment - and Peter can’t exactly say when Wade decided to move in – and Peter is eneveloped in Wade’s strong arms. And it feels so good. He loves how muscled and big his boyfriend is and how he smells. Like strong spices and the expensive shower gel he uses because it’s better for his scarred skin. Today he wears one of the fluffy sweaters aunt May bought them as a christmas gift. It’s khaki and every time Wade wears it Peter can almost imagine his boyfriend when he was still part of the military. Peter has to sigh because everything right now feels perfect and he never wants to move again. The feeling doesn’t go away when Wade kisses the top of his head and strokes the small of his back. 

 

Peter moves his head from the comfortable place on Wade’s chest to give him a chaste kiss on the lips before he stands on his toes to kiss his boyfriend’s nose, too. Wade seems to be more than pleased judging from his smile.  
„Aww, baby boy is cuddly today. Want to cuddle somewhere more comfortable? Like our bed?“ Wade asked him and wiggled his eyebrows.

  
And suddenly Peter felt a lot more nervous again. They never did anything without their clothes on. Sure, they made out whenever they felt like it and they made out often these past months. But he knew that Wade wanted more. He kissed him more fervently and he made even more sexual innuendos than he usually did. Peter knew that Wade would never pressure him into sex and it got a lot harder these days to stop their little make out sessions but Peter still needed to tell Wade the truth. And he wasn’t so sure if it would be a good idea to move to the bedroom now.

 

Apparently Wade could see Peter’s emotions because he immediately but gently let go of him and took a step back.

  
„We can also eat if you want. Did you eat? I bet you didn't. You don’t eat enough, my dear. Sit down and I will cook something for you.“

He tried to sound casual but Peter could detect a hint of hurt in his vice. Oh no. That was the last thing he wanted to accomplish. He was such an idiot. But Peter did as he was told and sat down on the blue chair in their kitchen. Wade rummaged through their fridge to find something he could cook for his ‚Petey-Pie‘ while Peter tried to find an easy solution for his problem. It just felt so stupid. Wade loved him. Surely he wouldn’t be upset to know that his boyfriend was still a virgin. Right? He knew he shouldn’t be worrying so much but even after all these years he couldn’t help it. Sometimes he still felt like little Peter Parker who got pushed and kicked at school. 

 

Sure, he knew he wasn’t exactly ugly and Wade always told him what a great ass he had but in contrast to his boyfriend Peter only felt…ordinary. Maybe even less. It didn’t matter how many times he and Wade trained together or how many bullets he had to dodge when he was on patrol as Spiderman…Peter never looked as manly and muscled as Wade did. He was athletic and he did own a few muscles but overall he still looked scrawny. And he didn’t kow what to do when it came to….it. Would Wade want him to know what to do? What would he expect? If Peter was being honest with himself then he couldn’t even say what he liked himself. How should he know what Wade would like? His boyfriend always seemed rough but when he was with Peter he always acted like a cute little marshmallow. Sometimes he even demanded belly rubs like a puppy. But when they kissed Wade almost always controlled the situation. Not in a bad way but he sure as hell always knew what he was doing and especially what it was doing to Peter. But no matter how far they took it….Peter always felt safe.

 

Peter could feel Wade’s eyes on him and decided that he could no longer suffer the silence between them. ‚Now or never‘ he thought and opened his mouth to tell the truth.

  
„Wade, I think I need to tell…“ but before he could even end his sentence Wade cut him off without taking his eyes off the pot full of pasta.

  
„You don’t want to have sex with me. It’s okay.“ He sounded so sad and resigned that Peter could swear he could hear his heart breaking into thousand little pieces.

  
„No, that’s not true.“ 

„Hey, it’s okay. Really. I know I’m not exactly a looker and I’m happy that I can kiss and cuddle you. That’s way more than I ever thought I could get. You still make me happy. No big deal, Peter.“ To emphasize his point he turned around to his boyfriend giving him a thumbs up.

It was so sad to see his boyfriend going back to his old insecurities. And to make it worse Wade turned back to the stove again and pulled the hood of his sweater over his head to hide his scarred face again.

Peter couldn’t sit on his chair one second longer. He quickly walked to Wade and slung his arms around the waist of his boyfriend. After turning the stove off he tried to make Wade listen to him. But his boyfriend still stirred the pasta.

  
„Wade, please turn around and look at me. Please.“ But no answer came.

  
„Please, honey. Do it for me.“ Peter knew that Wade would never say no to him and sighed out of relief when the mercenary finally turned his body around. But he still refused to look into Peter’s eyes.

„I do want to have sex with you, okay? And don’t interrupt me, please!“ Peter added when he saw Wade opening his mouth to comfort and tell him that it was alright. It wasn’t and Peter wanted to make sure that Wade would understand.

He brushed Wade’s hood off his face again so he could see his beautiful face better. Peter saw how Wade blushed and fought the instinct to hide his face again as quickly as possible.

„I…I lied to you.“ Now Peter felt bad when Wade looked him in the eye, a confused look on his face.

  
„I’m sorry, Wade. I know I shouldn’t have. I didn’t think it would matter at that point but now it does and I don’t know how to tell you because…Oh god, I still don’t know how to tell you because it’s so embarrassing and I don’t want you to think bad of me…“

  
„I never would, Petey. But you’re not making any sense, baby.“ Wade interrupted him.

  
Peter took a deep breath before he could finally find all his energy to open his mouth again.

  
„You remember the night when we watched Star Trek? The one with the whales?“ Wade only nodded. 

„You told me about a lot of things. You told me about your..about your sex life and…“ Peter wasn’t sure how to end his sentence without sounding like a total idiot.

  
„So?“ Wade looked even more confused now. „You told me about your first time with a man, too.“

  
Peter had to swallow the big lump in his throat and forced himself to face Wade again.

  
„That’s what I mean. I lied. I never had sex with a man. I never had sex with a woman too to be honest and I was too embarrassed to admit it. I still am I guess.“ Finally. Now he felt at least a tiny bit better. Still embarrassed but Wade didn’t look as sad anymore so that was a win.

  
„Why didn’t you just tell me? I wouldn’t have judged you, babe.“ And now Wade looks hurt again and Peter can’t take it anymore.

„Because I didn’t know that back then! We were barely friends at that point and I didn’t want you to see me as a little teenage boy. I wanted you to like me. But I didn’t really expect you to like me so I didn’t know how to tell you the truth once we became a couple. And now I just feel stupid.“

  
„Oh baby boy“ is the only thing Wade says before he takes him into his arms again. „How can you be a genius and be so stupid at the same time?“

He strokes his hair and it feels so good now that he knows that Wade is not mad at him. Peter still wants to make sure.

  
„You’re not mad?“ he asks. He's pouting like he did when he was still a little kid.

  
„No. I’m not mad. I get it. You didn’t know me back then and I understand why you lied to me. It was too soon to trust me. I’m a bit disappointed that you thought you couldn’t tell me after we became a couple but no, I’m not mad,“ he says and Peter clings even tighter to his boyfriend. How can he be so lucky to have someone like Wade?

  
„But Peter…do you really want to sleep with me now that I know you’re a cute little virgin?“ Peter pinches him for that.

  
„Yes.“ Peter tries to sound confident. He fails spectacularly. 

„But? It feels like you wanted to say ‚but‘, Peter.“ Wade crossed his arms and Peter is reminded of that one night after prom when he and Wade missed Peter’s curfew and aunt May was waiting for them behind the front door. Wade and his aunt shouldn't hang out together so often.  
Peter grudgingly leaned back so he could look Wade in the eye again.

  
„But I still feel a little insecure.“ It’s harder to admit than he thought.

  
„Then we need to talk about that, Petey. What is it that’s still worrying you huh? That it might be too good? That the neighbors will hear you moan my name?“ Peter blushed and Wade started to giggle again. It’s a good sound and Peter can’t be mad at him.

„I’m scared that you don’t like the way I look. No, no, no Wade! Let me talk first! Otherwise I’m never going to say it, okay?“ Wade pretends to zip his mouth shut and throws away the imaginary key. It’s cuter than it should probably be.

  
„I don’t know how to do…anything! I don’t know what to do to make you happy. I’m kinda graceful when I’m Spiderman but when I’m just Peter Parker I tend to get nervous and then I get clumsy. I guess I just don’t want to disappoint you. I don’t want it to be bad for you. I love you. And maybe I thought it would bother you that I don’t have any experience. No one but me even saw me naked before and...you have to teach me everything first. You’re older than I am and I was scared that it would annoy you to be reminded that I’m so much younger than you. “ Oh why did he always have to babble like that?

  
What Peter didn’t expect was the cooing noise that came out of his boyfriend’s mouth.

„You worry that I might not find you attractive enough? Peter, have you seen my face? Have you seen the rest of me? Well no, not yet but you know what I mean. And I've seen your ass in spandex before and let me tell you; I can't wait for your naked goodies!" He chuckled and paused for a few seconds before he turned serious again. Well...as serious as Wade can get. "I don’t know what you like either. We don’t have to rush things, babe. And I’m aware of the fact that I’m slightly older than you, thank you very much. Don’t make me sound like an old perv.“ Wade was winking at him. „Seriously Peter. We just have to learn together. “

  
„Like private lessons?“ Peter hopefully asked. Now his face turns red for a whole different reason.

  
Wade smirked. „Like our very own and sexy private lessons, baby boy. And I’m a great teacher.“ He stroked Peter's hip to underline his words.

  
„You know….I have nowhere to be right now.“ And with that he grabs Wade’s hand to drag his boyfriend into their bedroom.

  
Wade was right. He _was_ a great teacher.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> First things first! My first language is german and if you find any mistakes I'm really really sorry...don't hate me...
> 
> This is also my first Spideypool fic and I'm kinda new to it so please let me know what you think! :) I'm grateful for every kudos and comment.
> 
> You can find me on tumblr if you want to talk and cry together!  
> http://thebitchesterbrothers.tumblr.com/


End file.
